Finding My Way in My Own Autism Discovery

I’m so excited to introduce this week’s guest blogger, Jessica Beaty. You can check out her website here. Jessica is a Master IEP Coach®️ and also has recently received her own diagnosis of Autism. She wants to share her discovery and journey in hopes to support other educators of students with Autism diagnoses.

Childhood

As early as elementary school, I remember how having to speak in front of a classroom full of students would send me into a panic. My heart would begin beating so fast I thought it would jump right out of my chest. Once I mustered enough courage to speak, no coherent words could be formed except for sobs and tears streaming down my face.

The embarrassment from these events began decades worth of questioning my intelligence and ability to ever believe I could be successful.

Adulthood

Graduating from college – Washington State University, getting married, and having kids of my own to get closer to understanding. It also took a realization that I connected deeply to the way both of my children processed their worlds.

It made perfect sense to me, but never realized that it wasn’t a typical way of doing things.  Once they both were diagnosed with autism, I knew I needed to be evaluated despite not knowing anything about autism.

Fortunately, at the age of 36 years old and a lengthy evaluation process, I received my own autism, adhd, and learning disability diagnosis. Now, my passion for helping parents and teachers understand invisible disabilities became more personal. It’s important to understand that our children will express their struggles in ways that may not fully make sense to us.

How I started investigating the Autism diagnosis

 So, I am going to share five examples from my own childhood that should have triggered a deeper look in hopes it helps you support your students.

1) Non-speaking

I was non-speaking until about 6 years old. I am the first born, and both my parents were first time parents. It wasn’t until family members brought their concern that my parents reached out to our pediatrician for support. Even our pediatrician didn’t see it as a concern due to lack of knowledge in delays with girls. (it was the 1980s…)

2) Social Anxiety

Socially, I was a very anxious and withdrawn child. I enjoyed being around other children, from a distance. I’d get so focused with my own play that I didn’t notice when another child was trying to engage with me. My mom would have to consistently set up playdates and facilitate play so I’d engage with my playmate. This was a red flag for me in researching more about autism.

3) Unique Interests

From the moment I learned to write, I would fill out every single magazine subscription card that I would find in my parents’ magazines. I fortunately never mailed them, but it is still a running joke in our family about how terrified they were that I would. To this day, I have lists for lists that also have lists. 

4) Mutism

I struggled with situational mutism in a larger group setting. I can talk your ear off, but typically not unless I was approached first. Even when I began to find ways to cope with my mutism, if I was standing in front of a class or speaking to a group and notice that they were looking at me, I’d cry. So, I have learned to over-analyze how to interact in different scenarios in my head prior to attending these situations. I also knew this could be related in my autism journey.

5) Sensory

If there was noise in the classroom, I could not complete my work well. The ticking from the clock on the wall, the justling of the teachers bracelets while they wrote, the leg wiggle of my deskmate, and the whispers coming from other students nearby, would completely distract me from being able to hear all that the teacher was saying.

Summary

What I hope you take away from sharing these intimate details as an undiagnosed autistic child is to check in with all of your students, but also your student that has a reputation of “being quiet” or is viewed as a “model student”. It’s important to look beyond what is physically in front of you, and to learn how to support needs that are expressed invisibly.

Want to know more about Dyslexia, read this blog post!

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